I love life. I love being around people. I love showing people my love. I love being loved. All these are things I know I will do for the rest of my life, but when I say I love serving God, I get scared that it doesn't fit. I get scared that I won't be able to do it, to serve him as well as I should. Will I wuss out, will I quit, what if I can't take it?

Another thing I love is simplicity, I want simplicity. Sometimes I wonder if I'd be OK just being normal and happy. What if I didn't have to worry about sacrificing my whole life. It would be so easy...so...simple.

I'd like think that I KNOW I'd never be able to just live a mediocre life and just have a nice house and family. I don't. Honestly, serving God with the rest of my life doesn't seem that appealing sometimes. I'll admit, I'm in a slump. Having a hard time getting out.

I really don't want to feel this way, I want to want to serve God. I can't get past all this crap that I want to do and just do it His way. I just want life to be simple. Not worrying everyday. I am in no way giving up on God or my faith, just wondering why and how...maybe a little too much.

Pray for me.